website number calculator

Hundreds, no thousands! of you have written to me recently asking to explain how to ascertain the unlisted number of your favorite websites.
Most of the letters, greeting me warmly as Dear Shithead, have arrived just in the last few days (after I've skipped down the walkway to my small mailbox hoping to find free candy in a promised 'for official use only' yellow government envelope), following the televised appearance of Vice-President Joe Biden, a man whom you all know(pictured below with his new teeth!), a member of the smartest, cleanest, and articulated administration in the history of the world.

So, here's how it works: to find the number of a particular website on the internets what you do is take the tangent motion of the angle, constant only at a radius divided at the derivative, commonly known as t/r^5, usually a positive fraction A pedibus usque ad caput Ab initio Lusus naturae.

That's all there is to it. And keep those letters!